Sunday, May 20, 2012

Addiction is an Abusive Lover

Addiction is like an abusive lover, and the program of recovery is like the cops. We can want to be rid of the abusive lover and call the cops for help. The cops will come, remove the abusive lover, and even put out a restraining order if we want. Here's the catch:

Sometimes that ex-lover will come a-knockin' on our door. When they do, if we are feeling kinda low and lonely, or if we are feeling kinda high and really good about ourselves and think we can handle it, we might open the door and let that lover back in. IF we let that abusive lover back in, there ain't a darn thing the program of recovery or the cops or all the restraining orders in the world can do about it. We can kick them back out again, and the cops will come every time to help. But it will get harder each time; the abusive ex-lover will become more determined each time, based on previous success;  we will become more discouraged each time, based on previous failures.

Cravings are like abusers. They don't let go easily and rarely go away forever. So when that knock comes, when the craving hits, when the thought to pick up floats through our minds, we MUST remember what's under all that sweet talk, what's behind the flowers, what's inside those chocolates. Addiction is like an abusive lover. It's all sweetness and light until it's gets us back, then quickly knocks us down and proceeds to kick the shit out of us once again. BUT if we keep the door closed and don't let them back in, those knocks on the door will become less frequent, the abusive ex-lover becomes discouraged, and eventually it will become second nature to ignore the knocking at the door.


The program of recovery reminds us to keep the door closed and locked. The decision to do so remains ours.

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